Billy Connolly Moments
December 1st 2010 21:00
Photo by Chantiquemaltese. Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.
Every couple of months I like to retell a certain story to Fred. The story concerns a book I saw years ago at a bookshop. I can’t recall the exact title but it was something like Dog Breeding for Professionals. The part that had me rolling around in laughter was the section of the actual mating process: there were photos of people literally getting two dogs to get it on. The people’s faces had been blacked out.
For some reason, I found the incongruity funny. I mean, come on, it’s not as if the breeders were engaged in pornographic activity. They were simply trying to breed pedigree dogs, something any dog breeder would do. Every time I mention this book to Fred I would start shaking with laughter. I would clutch my stomach and have trouble with getting the words out. Fred would look at me quizzingly and say that I looked like Billy Connolly.
“That’s the problem with Billy Connolly,” Fred would say. “He’d be trying to tell a joke and he would find it so funny he would be on his hands and knees laughing and you wouldn’t even know what was so funny because he couldn’t get the joke out.”
By this stage, I would be propping myself up against the nearest wall, struggling to get the rest of the story out. “I’m having a Billy Connolly moment,” I would say. By the time I managed to tell him the whole story, Fred would be left wondering what was so funny in the first place.
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