Just Another Day at the Doctor’s Office
April 22nd 2009 21:00
About a year ago I was at my doctor’s, ready to get my first needle in years. Being a sook, I was nervous as hell, even though my doctor assured me the nurse was good and I should feel minimum pain.
Before the needle, my doctor took my blood pressure. She noticed my heart was racing.
“Are you feeling anxious about something?” she asked.
I thought it was obvious. “The needle,” I said.
When I later relayed this to my friend Fred, he looked at me as if he thought my doctor was dense and said, “Hasn’t she heard of white coat syndrome?”
“What’s that?” I asked.
“That’s when your blood pressure goes up due to you feeling anxious about being at the doctor’s office.”
But back to my doctor’s. After taking my blood pressure, she took me to another room where her nurse worked. I noticed a lolly jar and thought how sweet that they would keep lollies to give to children. I remember that when my sister was little, her doctor used to give her lollies after each visit. The scheme was so successful my sister grew to look forward to seeing him.
Imagine my surprise when the nurse handed me the lolly jar.
“No, thanks,” I said, not wanting to deprive the children.
“No, you should take one,” my doctor said. She said something about them being good to have before a needle.
“Take two,” said the nurse so I took two lime jelly beans.
I started chewing away as the nurse told me where to sit. I pulled out my photos of Butterscotch and the nurse, in an obvious attempt to distract me, started asking me about him.
“Is that your cat?” she asked as she sat beside me. I tried not to look at the needle she was holding near my arm. “No, don’t look down. Look away.”
I looked at my photos instead. I started to focus on the photo where he looks possessed, the one shown above.
“So whose cat is it?” she asked.
“My friend’s.”
“And what’s his name?”
“Butterscotch.”
“Butterscotch,” she repeated. “And how do you spell it?”
“B-U-T-T-E-R-oooowwww!!!” I cried. By the time I looked down, the needle was already out.
“That’s it. It’s all over,” she said, putting a band aid on my arm.
I was shocked. It was probably the least painful needle I have ever received. Normally I swear like a trooper and hiss like an angry goose when I’m getting needles but this time, all I could manage was a long ow!
After that, I always made sure that same nurse was on duty whenever my doctor said I needed a needle. We still go through the same routine except I don’t feel as anxious about needles as before.
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